Even a newbie at public speaking knows they should make eye contact. But the term eye contact is rather vague. It can infer just making fleeting “contact” with a person then moving on. Don’t make eye contact – make “eye connection”.  Eye connection means spending time with each person so that person feels like you’re just talking to them. Eye connection has two major benefits:

After Debbie Friez's guest post on body language last month , these commenters wonder whether the eyes have it--or not. Here's what they wondered: In terms of body language, I would also love to know more about eye contact and what it communicates ...Eye Eye contact is not super-comfortable for me, but I'm afraid it makes me look evasive or dishonest (when I'm not at all). I often wonder how much eye contact is passable, professionally.

In a workshop the other day, a participant asked “How do you make eye contact over the telephone?” Of course, you can’t make eye contact over the telephone. We tell people to gesture and smile as they speak.  Tags: Conference 8221; I love that question.

TED, the technology/education/design conference, hires a photographer to capture its dynamic speakers, and James Duncan Davidson offers this "dear speakers" essay on everything from taking off your name tag to how to move effectively around the speaking space. Since some of our readers recently asked questions about eye contact and connecting with the audience, take a look at his advice on where to look. He says eye contact will: ...make make them feel like you are addressing them.

Here's Stephanie Benoit talking about eye contact, her second priority for stepping up her speaking. Eye contact's basic and essential for good speaking: You can't succeed without it. Eye contact: May distract you. Means you have to confront your audience, directly. May show you an awkward or awful reaction. May give away what you're thinking or forgetting. In my experience,all of those are valid concerns--but no reason to stop making Yet for many speakers, it's tough to focus on the audience. Why?

Can eye contact trip you up? This week, my video--at the end of this post--is responding to Stephanie's #2 coaching priority and covers these aspects of how eye contact issues can work against you: If your eyes signal that your talk's off-track: Those quick, inadvertent looks to one side or the other (or up and to angle) happen at the same points that you might otherwise use a verbal "um" -- the points where you've forgotten where you are heading or what words come next. (Here's Instead of these "visual ums," I Absolutely--and you're less likely to notice it than is your audience.

When you’re at an event where several people speak, you’ll notice that some people sprinkle their talk with filler words, especially “uh.” 8221; By contrast, those who speak without filler words sound polished and eloquent. I’ve noticed that educators seem to think that they don’t do public speaking, but they do! Do you strive to look, sound, and perform your best when you present? Say good-by to filler words

Of course there was eye contact. Tags: Connection eye contac Last Friday night, I enjoyed the music scene in Nashville and went to both a Karaoke Bar and a blues bar.   While the Karaoke bar was an interesting novelty, I left after about 30 minutes. By contrast, I didn’t want to leave the blues bar and only did so when I remembered that I had to get up early the next morning.

Just like a great auctioneer, you want to speak in a personal, animated way, like you’re having an intense conversation with a friend.  8220;It’s not just about eye contact. Then randomly move to another audience member until you’ve made eye contact with everyone in the room.  Ever wondered what it takes to auction off a priceless Picasso or a rare Egyptian artifact?  The key to success is one word: connection.

And here is a supposed speech expert who is immediately boring with monotone voice and no eye contact – bad! For only about 30 seconds though, as the energy plummets so quickly I then raise my voice, step out behind the lectern, look at people with good eye contact and rip up the speech. I get frustrated at presentation advice which says you have to do something clever or dramatic at the beginning of a presentation to grab your audience’s attention. That’s for three reasons: